Hey there, darling!
Do you have a big dream? because I have a big dream.
Does it eat away at you? because it eats away at me.
Are you taking steps to make it reality? because I haven’t done much at all. But maybe that’s about to change…
I started thinking about a project I would like to do. It involves roaming around the country and possibly the world for a few years. It means not having a settled “home”. And I thought, “that’s something you’re supposed to do in your 20s. Your 30s is when you’re supposed to settle down and stay in one place.” I thought, “It’s too late for me.” Then I found myself yelling at myself (as I do…)
Who the hell says it’s supposed to be that way?! So what if other people think that’s how it should go? Why do I care? If I want to do this, I can do this. Age shouldn’t stop me. Other people’s opinion of it shouldn’t stop me.
And… let’s get really real here, what’s truly stopping me is me. It’s my fear. Fear of what other’s will think of it, of me. Fear of trying and failing, of not enjoying it. But, frankly, that’s all crap!
I need to let go of giving a fuck what other people think. Of what I assume their judgements of me are or will be (because really I don’t know that, and I don’t need to know. It’s not for me to worry about.)
I need to let go of my expectations of what it will be, and allow myself to experience it for what it is.
So now it’s time for me to figure out what steps I can take to get to where I want to be. As my dad always told me – “[I’m] not getting any younger.” (Man, how I hated this in my teens and early 20s. Now I remind myself of it constantly. Thanks, Dad, for being a dad!)
I don’t want to be at the same place I am now when I’m 40 and thinking, “I wish I started all of these things when I was 30.” There’s no guarantee it will work out, but there’s an absolute guarantee it will not work out if I don’t try. Time will pass either way.
So, are we going to take a proactive part in our lives? Or are we going to sit by and let it all happen to us? We get to make that choice, and we are responsible for owning it.
There it is – my big dream. I think a lot of close friends and family know it, or could have guessed it, but now I’m putting it out there for all to see.
And you know, I know people will put it down. They say, “oh that’s nice” very dismissively. They think, “That will never happen.” Most of the time, I believe them. I go along, “oh, you’re right. Seems nice, but I won’t do it.” I dismiss my own damn dream!
Yet, there’s also this other part of me, a part that’s growing, and getting louder. And it says, “Well screw that! I’m doing it! You don’t believe me? That’s okay. You don’t have to. It’s not your dream to believe in. It’s mine.” I get more determined! More pumped.
Now the question is (one of the many), are you with me? Are we going to take charge of our lives? Are we going to be the sweet, kind, badasses that I know we are?
Alright, I want to know – What’s YOUR big dream? What steps are you taking to make it happen?
Oh, and if anyone knows what a good next step is for me, please do let me know! I’m quite clueless, here.